THE CARDBOARD SPACE PROGRAM

JETDOG

ZERO BUDGET.
MAXIMUM ALTITUDE.

One dog. One box.
Absolutely no idea how to land.

BOARD THE QUESTIONABLE AIRCRAFT ↗Read the incident report ↓

FRAGILE PACKAGE. UNBREAKABLE CONFIDENCE.

LIVE FROM THE BOX / CAM 01● GOOD BOY ON BOARD
JETDOG, a Shiba flying through a sparkling blue sky in a cardboard box with a rocket flame“Wait.
Where are
the brakes?”
DESTINATION: SOMEWHEREETA: WOOF
AIR MAIL
HANDLE WITH TREATS
NOT EVERY DELIVERY NEEDS A DESTINATION.THIS ONE NEEDS ADULT SUPERVISION.
PRIORITY WOOF ✦ FRAGILE BUT FEARLESS ✦ TAPE IS A TECHNOLOGY ✦ JETDOG ✦ PRIORITY WOOF ✦ FRAGILE BUT FEARLESS ✦ TAPE IS A TECHNOLOGY ✦ JETDOG ✦
CLASSIFIED-ISH
FLIGHT INCIDENT REPORT № 001
JETDOG's questionable pilot credentials
PILOT
A DOG.
AIRCRAFT
A BOX.
QUALIFICATIONS
SITS ON COMMAND.
LANDING GEAR
FOUR PAWS.
CLEARED
FOR WOOF
AN EXTREMELY UNOFFICIAL ORIGIN STORY

HE ORDERED
A DOG BED.
KEPT THE BOX.

It was a normal delivery. A normal box. A normal dog with a deeply abnormal level of confidence.

He chewed two wing holes, sat down and heard someone say, “Express shipping.” He took that personally.

One suspicious flame later, he was above the clouds. The delivery app still says “Arriving today.”

“Houston, we have a good boy.”— MISSION CONTROL, WHICH IS ALSO A DOG
TOTALLY FICTIONAL AEROSPACE SPECIFICATIONS

BUILT BY INSTINCT.
TESTED BY ACCIDENT.

1

CARDBOARD BOX

Previously contained a bed.
Now contains ambition.

0

PILOT LESSONS

He watched a pigeon once.
That seemed sufficient.

∞

GOOD BOY ENERGY

Not a recognised fuel.
He was not informed.

FLIGHT PLANUP. MORE UP. WE'LL FIGURE IT OUT.BOX CHECKED ✓
THE MOST ADVANCED THREE-STEP PLAN EVER CHEWED

PACK. BARK.
DEPART.

PHASE 01 / ENGINEERING
The cardboard aircraft of JETDOGAerodynamic?
It's a rectangle.

TRUST THE BOX.

Reinforce with tape.
Ignore every reasonable concern.

PHASE 02 / IGNITION
JETDOG launching into the skyThat's probably
supposed to glow.

LIGHT THE NONSENSE.

Check snacks.
Forget literally everything else.

PHASE 03 / NAVIGATION
JETDOG in the blue skyI can see
the dog park!

MISS YOUR EXIT.

The dog park was left.
He went interstellar.

A SIMULATION. PLEASE DON'T LAUNCH YOUR DOG.

MISSION
CON-FUR-OL.

Press the big button.
Trust the smallest space agency on the internet.

NO TRANSACTIONS. NO WALLET. JUST CARDBOARD PHYSICS.

JETDOG FLIGHT SYSTEMSSTANDBY
READY
✓ TAPE✓ SNACKS✕ TRAINING

All systems questionable. Pilot surprisingly calm.

QUESTIONS FROM THE GROUND CREW

WAIT.
HE CAN FLY?

Apparently.
We're equally surprised.

How is the box flying?

Confidence, tape and a complete misunderstanding of express delivery. It's a meme. Physics was not consulted.

Is he going to the moon?

He's trying to get to the dog park. His navigation is spectacularly bad. That's a story, not a price prediction.

What does the launch button do?

A short countdown and a simulated flight message. No real launch, wallet connection or transaction.

Is any of this serious?

The dog is very serious. Everything else is fictional meme nonsense. No financial promises or real flight data.

THE SKY WAS NEVER THE LIMIT. THE TAPE WAS.

STAY AIRBORNE.BACK TO THE BOARDING GATE ↑